A bitter marriage

This is true story which happened with a distant relative. Hence the name in the post has been changed.

Swathi was her parents only daughter. Her parents were anxious to get her married as she turned 25 (for some 25 is still considered too late for a girl to be married). Swathi kept rejecting proposals one after the other supposedly 18 as some of her family members  claim. But the proposals kept coming nevertheless, considering the fact that she was very pretty.

After much persuasion or pressure from the parents Swathi finally gave in and her marriage was fixed with a handsome man working in the middle east.  The parents were elated so were the extended family and friends. The invitations were printed all the near and dear ones were invited for the wedding.

The wedding was a grand affair followed by the reception in the evening. Post wedding Swathi moved to the middle east to be with her husband. It was barely a month into the wedding when on a fateful day Swathi’s father received a phone call  informing him of his daughter’s death. The reason for death – SUICIDE.

Swathi had left behind a death note running 2 pages where she wrote the reasons why she took such an extreme step. She wrote about how she was compelled to marry against her wishes. The parents wouldn’t agree to her being married to the person she loved because he belonged to a different  caste/community. She pleaded but in vain. The mother threatened to commit suicide the father to cut off all ties with her. She succumbed to pressure  and reluctantly agreed for the marriage but not before putting put a fight. She consumed sleeping pills and made an attempt to suicide as an escape to marriage. The parents managed to keep this event a secret.

The parents hoped their daughter would soon forget all about the love and be happily married far off with her husband. But fate proved them wrong and they lost their only daughter.

What could have been done to save Swathi’s life? Were the parents very rigid on her? Why are inter caste/community  marriages still considered a taboo in villages and small towns? Had Swathi been brave and confronted the husband about the issue?

These are questions which would haunt the people who had known/ associated or even heard about this incident.

As I write this post my heart goes out the innocent man married to Swathi who had to go through all this with no fault of his.

Hope fully there will be day when we will look at life  beyond caste, colour and creed.

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10 thoughts on “A bitter marriage

  1. Parents have destroyed three life’s here , daughters-the husbands and the lovers .. I dont understand what did they get out of all this.

    We do everything for the happiness of our child and yet sometimes we are the reason for their unhappiness and death too in this case

    I do wish and hope too that a day soon comes where we will be beyond color-caste-creed – religion

    • It might sound harsh, but I think the girl is as much to be blamed as the parents. Had she taken a strong stand, perhaps she could have informed the guy she was to marry. This could have saved her life too.

  2. Sigh! Something similar had happened with one of my cousins too; he had no idea about it all till he read the suicide note. She had also mentioned that my cousin would have been a very good husband to anyone, and she was not lucky enough for that 😦 Such a shock!

  3. These events have become so commonplace that it isn’t even shocking. What is shocking is that they fail to teach so many people a lesson. Why force a marriage where no one will be able to live happily? It fails me. Really it does.

  4. I am saddened beyond words. I don’t know why such parents exist. I don’t know what false joys they are trying to achieve. So disheartening.

    • It is very saddening! But I was shocked when I heard a few people discuss this incident among themselves. They sympathize with the parents and blame the girl for putting her parents and the husband through all this!!! Their argument is “How can children be so selfish? The parents work so hard to bring up their children and this is what they return!!!” How do you explain anything these people??

  5. This is so sad 😦 I wish Swathi had taken a stand against getting married, if she wasn’t ready. It might have helped if the parents didn’t push her into marriage right after they rejected the guy she brought home. So heartbreaking…I don’t know what to say 😦

    • It indeed is very heartbreaking. What is it that it ultimately lead to loss of their daughter’s life. Was it worth it? The parents might be guilt ridden for the rest of their lives.

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